Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Divorce and Snow Storms

The last couple of days we have been snowed in our home. We received more than 10 inches of snow and for central Oklahoma that is alot. We are not really use to dealing with it. Well, we do deal with it. Everything shuts down and we all stay home.

During this unplanned break, I have been cleaning my office. I ran across something my daughter wrote. It is called Love is War. She talks about doing stuff we will later regret - some big or small. She refers to divorce as big. As I think about her writing, I am grateful that she at nine sees divorce as a regret. I am not judging anyone who is divorced, sometimes it is the best solution especially in abuse. However, I do feel that too many people rush into divorce thinking that if only they had someone new or if they didn't have to deal with the person their with's faults their life would be better.

I am not going to go into too much detail here, but I will tell you that my husband and I hit a really rough patch in our marriage a couple of years ago. Most people would have cut and ran. Quite frankly, it seemed it would be easier just to let him go. I won't pretend to think what he was thinking about it all but I am sure he probably felt the same way.

As I thought about us and our family and sought God's guidance, I really believed and later found in the Bible that God hates divorce. He hates families being broken up and torn apart. In the second chapter of Malachi, it states "I hate divorce, says the Lord God of Israel." God uses marriage and family to teach us about Him. As humans, we hurt the ones we love and we don't deserve their love or forgiveness but often we get it anyway. That is what Jesus did on the cross for us. We don't deserve it but He did it anyway.

If you are reading this and struggling with your spouse, read "Love and War" by John Eldredge. It is a great book that challenged and changed the way I viewed marriage. You will not be sorry you read it. I promise even if you don't feel like it, working on saving your marriage and family will not be time wasted no matter the outcome.

God does not promise us easy or perfect lives. However, He promises he will never leave us. I speak from experience when I say during those dark days when I felt my marriage and family ripped right out of my hands, He was there. I knew He held my tears in His hands. He had a plan. He has helped us restore our marriage. I am so grateful when I say that I never knew just how cool, strong, sexy, fun, and thoughtful a man my husband was. Now I am keenly aware of how much I adore him. I am thankful he is by my side and partner in this life.

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